Okay, with less than 3 weeks to go - it's time to do this properly!

This is me



and this is my best mate vangina septipcle flaps (don't ask - she's sensitive about her condition).



and together, we are running riot across America for 3 months!

Our first big trip, and although she's slept in my bed for like 6 nights in a row when she's trying to steal my family...it's the first time we'll be in each other's face so much. Considering she broke my nose by trying to forehead slap me last weekend, i'd say we are off to a fantastic start!

When I'm in America:

I plan on taking photos like these at disneyland:



I plan on drinking ALOT of this:



I plan on stalking the following person:



and also tracking down this whore so i can bitchslap her for stealing brenda's man:



I hope the bus seats are more comfortable than these:


otherwise i'm going to be on the hunt for these....cos we all know how much i like to sleep on a potplant:



I'm really scared then when i'm in Vegas, i'm going to be so drunk and forget to marry a random at Elvis's chapel



i hope that if i do remember to get married and am choosing a potential husband for a trashbag impromptu wedding, that i'm NOT wearing my beer goggles



but secretly...i hope this guy just happens to come along and marries me and I end up queen of the keg house:



I hope I don't get arrested for following this guy. Remember, it's not stalking if they like it.



I also want to track down this girl, so i can help her bitch slap Speidi.



and hopefully she'll introduce me to this guy, so we can discuss my second marriage and we can start making plans for our big day:



If Vanessa brings one of these shit ass feral avocado pizzas into any of our rooms, i'm going to be forced to punch her in the face and break her nose too.



and lastly, despite the fact i have my eyes closed (even i was scared of my dirty blonde shazza hair) and my brother looks like a crazy eyed psychopath - these are the people i'll miss most when i'm gone.




As for the rest of you, you all know i will miss you too(like crazy!), but deep down we all know you'll miss me more.

Stay tuned for daily (yep daily! i'm taking my laptop for this exact reason) updates on the shenanigans of Team Vange. Their mission? Rid the world of alcohol...one drink at a time. (well..maybe two drinks at a time, i've got two hands, and i don't want to waste time in bar queues - that's just silly)

Love you all long time (sucky sucky and all that jazz)

Ange
xox

Newsflash....

i like shiny disco balls, did you know?

it's on like donkey kong....

the countdown that is!

Today is September 3, so that means it's exactly 3 months until this young lass and spreads her wings (well actually AirNZ will be spreading their wings, but whatever) and heads to LA!

Helllooooooo Hollywood!

Life Is Grand....or at least it will be in 5 months!

Okay, so it’s Friday 25 July 2008...i followed my usual daily routine - woke up late, take my sweet time getting ready, leave the house with nowhere near enough time to get to the station, drive like an idiot to get to the station and illegally park, because i don’t have the time to park in yonder and make it to the platform in time, but still have to sprint for the train like i’m running an olympic race and trying to beat cathy freeman (for those who are interested, i did beat cathy freeman …but that’s another story)

I get off at Town hall and grab my breakfast - when i get out of the train station - it’s raining...as in absolutely pissing down and it’s remarkably cold, like as in colder than catherine fields at 5am cold.

I’ve got my coat on, my beanie’s on my head (some say it looks like a tea cosy..whatever..i like it bitches) and my scarf is tied tightly around my neck - i’m trying to open my umbrella without spilling my coffee or dropping my toast - only to have a bus drive past and splash water all over me, and then have some silly wench nearly poke my eye out with her brolly - bitch! Anyway...most would think what a shit morning and be grumpy yeah? but no - not me!

I realised that this time in exactly 5 months...it will be Christmas Day, and really what is better than Christmas Day? Well! Let me answer you question, cos that’s what i do - i’m here for the people you know what i’m saying??

The only thing that is better than Christmas Day...is Christmas Day in New York - which is where I will be! And don’t get me wrong - while i’m quite devastated about not being a part of the annual institution that is Bradbury Pub on Xmas Eve - I am so f**king excited about New York...that i just can’t hide it....I’m about to lose control! But you know what? I think i like it!

So while you guys are boozing it up on xmas day, getting blind in the sun - spare a thought for me - I’ll be ice-skating at Rockerfeller Centre (haha and probably breaking a leg), i’ll be watching the xmas spectacular with the Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall, throwing snowballs at Van and Speciew in Central Park - and boozing it up with Contiki Kids at the Orphan Christmas Party before we leave on our trip the next day!

So while i’m sitting here bored at work - I think to myself, what a wonderful world.